The subject of black tax has been an important topic from generation to generation. Ndumi Hadebe has sparked a different perspective to the topic, with the book Handle Black Tax Like a Pro – quite a conversation starter! Sub-titled: Setting Boundaries, Improving Relationships and Achieving freedom.
Getting to know Ndumi, she reckons that describing herself is strange because , “People are multi-layered and diverse,” she says. While relating herself to the book, “I am someone who has struggled with boundaries, so I teach what I continue to learn about”. Born and raised in Durban, Clermont, Ndumi is the second of three children raised by both her mother and father. She is “A marketer by qualification”, who eventually accepted that she is a coach and teacher at heart – having resisted it for years after getting her certificate in Neuro-Linguistics Program for coaching.
Her journey of writing the book was set off after commenting on a Facebook post Ndumi which led to her being invited to a webinar event to share her insights about black tax and boundaries.
Recalling the events, “It was at the height of covid. I’d prepared about 10 bullet points, I sat casually in front my laptop and I was shocked when I was introduced as the guest speaker.” she says. Writing a book was never part of her plan, until after the event. A writing coach, Lauren Shapiro, approached her and said to Ndumi “There is a book in that talk” and argued that so many people could benefit from learning about healthy boundaries around black tax and their lives in general. After one coaching session, Ndumi was convinced, and the rest was history.
Using some core fundamentals depicted in her book. Ndumi describes “Boundaries have influenced how I show up workspaces, relationships and everywhere else”.
Ndumi explains that people should understand that one’s finances is determined by the quality of the relationship they have with money, “Interestingly, we are not taught about the concept of having a relationship with money”, a concept she learnt on Money Magic course from her other coach, Donna McCallum.
While some may think that the book stands against black tax, the truth is that it advocates for it, “I am not saying that people must not do black tax, by all means, just do it in a that is responsible and wisely – for example not getting into debt to fund black tax. Also, that black tax can be done with love and compassion – through transparent conversations”.
Another point Ndumi speaks to is honesty, “Never lie to your family and say that you do not have the money because you have it, but it is budgeted for your other needs” she says.
Advising people regarding black tax, Ndumi says, “I would advise people to buy the book, I think it is important that people see themselves in other people’s stories, so that they realise they are not alone in this. But most importantly – people need to learn to define what their boundaries are and how to set them in a way that is healthy and constructive”.
As a coach herself, Ndumi advocates for coaches and emphasizes the importance of having a coach, “Without a coach, I would not have finished this book. I wouldn’t have been able to get rid of credit card debt – it’s a support structure that works – at least for me”. If you need a guest speaker or a boundaries coach Ndumi is the person to contact, from one-on-ones to group coaching – she is ready and armed with practical tools to share.
If you are looking for an intervention that addresses how to strike a healthy balance between helping family or relatives and maintaining healthy boundaries for yourself then “Handle Black Tax Like a Pro” is a must-read for you. The book is a series of short stories that depicts various scenarios in the spectrum of black tax, each story is followed by a reflections section as to how black tax challenges could have been approached efficiently through healthy boundaries.